The worst mommy ever!

I'm an aweful mother! :( I started looking around my neighborhood for pediatricians for Paul. Writing down the name and numbers of the offices I saw and then called and asked a few basic questions. None of that really helped me find one though, so I started asking the mothers at the park that I know. The problem is everyone here has strange last names and I couldn't keep them in order for who was who. One of my friends was actually a nurse for a pediatrician until she broke her ankle. She loved him and highly recommended him, but his office is a forty minute walk from our house, which is no big deal if it's just a check up or shots, but if he was sick that would be a long walk. (I know I have a car, but I might as well not, the parking in my area is so bad, I feel handicapped, I suck!) There is an office just up the street that didn't look to bad and had yes' to all of the questions I called about. One of the other mothers highly recommended her dr. who isn't to far, I thought I knew were it was, but when I went for a walk and looked for it I didn't see it. I prayed about it, but I was so uncertain that I must not have been listening or something. I never felt great one way or the other. So after debate I decided that I would just try the guy up the street and if we didn't like him, I wouldn't go back. Anton said ok.

So we went last Thursday and were not impressed. I knew the office was going to be small, most places here are, I understand the space issue, but they never shut any of the doors to the patient room so you could see and hear what was going on around you and I found it very strange that they had fridges in each of the rooms clearly labeled with what was in them, some of it I was sure was against HIPPA. The nurse weighed Paul, checked his temp. and measured his height, then she left the room and we just stood there wondering what we were supposed to do. So we waited. She came in and out a few times, not saying anything and the dr. popped in asked what we were doing today and I told him that Paul needed his next shots. And that was that. He didn't listen to his breathing, check his heat beat, in his eyes, mouth, nose, or little manly parts, that have always been part of every dr. visit he has ever had. They asked no back ground questions on his medical history, granted he's one, but still this was their first time seeing him. He didn't ask about his development or if we had any concerns, nothing. I was so shocked I was kind of flabbergasted the rest of the appointment.

They moved me across the hall. And the sitting while they rushed in and out commenced. Finally the dr. came in. They drew Paul's blood for a test that is required at one year, but that I didn't have a copy of the results. I did remember everything was normal, but they said that they would just run it again. I don't know much, but this was made me question, he could easily get it faxed from our old dr. Why do it again?

Paul received three shots, one in each arm and one in his leg, all of them given by the dr and not the nurse. He told me we needed to come back next Tuesday for one more and then we were done, the dr, just walked out without saying anything. I went up to the front desk, had the girl fill out his immunization card and we left. I was so befuddled that I was upset, but didn't know what to do about it. When we got home I looked at the card and she had only marked two shots instead of the three they had given him. I wasn't just shocked anymore I was getting angry. I made a list of things I was going to ask them for next visit and made a clear decision that the shot on Tuesday was our last visit with this dr!

Tuesday was pretty much the same, except that there was a longer wait. The nurse, who I actually feel bad for, didn't remember who we were, but was helpful when I asked for a copy of his blood results, and filled in the missing shot on the vaccination card, but it wasn't in a required field. She was trying to explain to me what it was for, but I didn't really understand what she was talking about. She said it was the one that we weren't supposed to get wet for two days, um what? She was surprised that he hadn't told us that and than just kind of smiled. Yeah I was done with this office.

That night when Anton got home. I had him look it over. They gave Paul a tuberculosis test. Who gives a tuberculosis test to a 16 month old? It wasn't given in his forearm where it is supposed to and they didn't even check it when we went back in. I was so shocked! It isn't anything that will hurt Paul, but how did I let that happen? They didn't even ask to do it. I obviously fell so bad! Anton told me that he would call the dr. today.

The first thing Anton asked me when I get up this morning was if i had look for reviews of this dr? No I said, I feel very foolish now, but I didn't even know you could I guess. It wasn't necessary in our small town in Utah, there were only 12 pediatricians and I had been given recommendations by my OBGYN and a million mothers that I knew. Anton looked this dr up, and the reviews were all aweful! All of the complaints were the same as I had discovered. He is a money grubber, he dose unnecessary shot and test to get more money from the insurance companies.

I am sitting here trying not to cry and I literally feel sick! How could I have taken Paul to that Dr? How could I not have asked more questions while I was there, yes I was in a state of shock or something at how things were running, but shouldn't that have kicked me into overdrive to be more on top of things? I am the worst mother ever!! I will NEVER EVER, be that passive again during a dr's visit!!!!!

I have already gone on line and looked at the reviews for the other two dr's I had thought of using and I will be making a prayerful decision and taking him in for a well check up visit soon.

Tears! Oh I feel so sick!!